Bye, THE VOICE OF THE PHILIPPINES :)

I lost the battle rounds last Sunday.. To be more precise, I lost about 3weeks ago. I had to keep it to myself for so long. Before it aired, I had to go about my day, meet people, work, show up in interviews... I thought i was doing okay until it did air... And it finally sank in. I lost. And I won't be proceeding to the Live Shows.

I won't deny it, I felt like I hit rock bottom...... again. I suddenly felt so unsure of everything around me. I asked God why He put me there when He wasn't gonna get me through it. Why I had to be in the trio, why I was paired with two ladies with two different genres.. Why they had to move us a day earlier, why I didn't get to sing what I rehearsed cause I had too much phlegm, why I had to have a fever on the night of our battles, why we had to perform at 3am, why after waiting for this for so long, i'm all of a sudden OUT of the game, why it feels so UNFAIR... Why now when I've learned to love everyone there? Why now when I have all these plans and these dreams and.... UGH, WHY NOW... :(

I hid all my frustrations from the world and from everyone around me. To them I may have looked okay... But I knew deep inside that I was breaking. Until one Wednesday, Yeng Constantino spoke at one of LifeBox Makati's events and she gave her testimony. She said things I already knew... But when she said it, I began to understand.. All my questions were answered that night. When I surrendered, every fog, every sign of vagueness disappeared. It was finally clear to me.....

Even if I got to do my runs the way i rehearsed them.. Even if I wasn't sick.. Even if the song was favoring me.. Even if i wasn't put in the trio, If it's not God's will for me to be in that competition any longer, i still won't win. If it was, I could fall off the stage (still praying that would never happen HEHE), crack as much as i want to and still win!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lDjn1j-3aIU

And after spending much time praying... And just asking GOD WHY HE LET ME LOSE... I realized how I didn't really lose at all. I'M IN THE CENTER OF GOD'S WILL...... And He who holds my future has the victory!

Plus I got the chance to meet such beautiful, talented people who i can now, confidently call family! I got to be mentored by Apl De Ap and Arnel Pineda! I got to meet Bamboo, Sarah G and Ms Lea Salonga. I got to meet my best friends, #TeamTakaw and the best fans #moisters through this too. I never lost. It may be the end for me in TheVoiceOfThePhilippines (MAYBE i can come back next year? Hihi) but I NEVER REALLY LOST. I won so much more than just a title ;)

PENELOPE DESERVED IT :) I am genuinely happy for her. Pag nagrerehearse kaming tatlo ng 3 ng umaga, hirap na hirap na kami ni Cara pero si Pen sobrang effortless. She is one talented girl and I'm blessed to have been privileged to sing with her and my beautiful Cara :)

So to everyone who's sent me all those gifts and flowers and messages... I am so encouraged by all of you. Sorry if I haven't replied yet, i will get to that in a bit! :) But thank you... With all my heart... Thank you for making my short time in "The Voice" one of the greatest highlights of my life!

PS
To everyone who's asking... I'M OKAY! God is holding me :) Thanks for all your prayers!